Robert's House of Hamsters

Somewhere between Sacramento, the Oregon border and that tingly feeling in your toes.



To the victims of the Valentine's Day Massacre:


Totally random

We are the pirates who don't do anything,
We just stay at home and lie around.
And if you ask us to do anything,
We'll just tell you we don't do anything.

Well, I've never been to Cleveland and I've never been to Denver,
And I've never buried treasure in St. Louis or St. Paul.
And I've never been to Moscow and I've never been to Tampa,
And I've never been to Boston in the fall.

And I never hoist the mainstay and I never swab the poopdeck,
And I never veered starboard because I've never sailed at all.
And I never walk the gangplank and I've never owned a parrot,
And I've never been to Boston in the fall.

Well, I've never plucked a rooster and I'm not too good at ping-pong,
And I've never throwed my mashed potatoes up against the wall,
And I've never kissed a chipmunk and I've never gotten head lice,
And I've never been to Boston in the fall.

It's not all that bad...

...these could be you.


Latest iTunes downloads

"Passenger Seat" by SHeDAISY
"Head Like A Hole (Clay)" by Nine Inch Nails
"Kerosene" by Miranda Lambert
"Beat Box" by Matisyahu
"Dirthouse" by Static-X
"To Live Is To Hide" by Lacuna Coil
"Steal the Show" by Stereo Motion
Underworld: Evolution soundtrack

Let's see, I have female country, a female-fronted goth metal band that's not Evanescence (which was also the primary reason for purchasing the soundtrack), an electro-grunge classic, a so-so electro-metal band, a Christian mod-rock band that doesn't exist anymore, and a reggae artist that just happens to be a Hasidic Jew.

I think I got my bases covered.

I was an evil child...

"Mom, Dad, how come every time I get in trouble around Dad 'I'm just like my mother' and every time I get in trouble around Mom 'I'm just like my father'?"

(I don't know if I did the punctuation right at the end of that sentence, and frankly, grammar stops between midnight and 6 a.m. Like liquor sales between 2 a.m. and 6 a.m.)


Pigs are flying, Hell's frozen over and Satan's giving free sleigh rides.

So, up in P-Town, I've been covering county government, and a particular item that's been causing reader interest is the county board of supervisor's approval of the implementation of a classification compensation study, basically a big thing that readujusts the wages of county employees to compare to that of other counties.

This includes a raise for the supervisors themselves-- 56 percent.

It's become a popular subject, due to the size. I've seen stuff from people on both sides of the issue But the reason I bring this to your attention is because of a letter to the editor that ran in today's paper concerning the issues I've been writing stories on.

Here's the interesting snippit:

Have you heard that the readership is down across the country in newspapers where the reporting is so biased towards the left and some of these papers have had to file for bankruptcy? All I want is fair and balanced reporting. I am once again disappointed in your paper related to this harmful attack on our supervisor. A balanced reporting effort would cite Kim's many accomplishments.

That's right, folks! I'm just another member of that dreaded "MSM." A cog in the great printing press under the control of Howard Dean, Ted Kennedy and Hillary Clinton. The same reporter who within the last two years wrote this, this, this, this, this, and maybe most importantly this, is nothing but a dirty left-wing hack who fondles himself in his roommate's recliner while a Michael Moore film plays in the background.

If you're suddenly injured by a chunk of falling sky, I don't assume full responsibility for it. It's also the fault of Christians, white males, the Second Amendment, Wal-Mart, loggers, farmers, miners, lack of gay marriage, the pro-life movement, possible privitization of Social Security, the No Child Left Behind Act, no universal health care and Republicans in control of the branches of government.

Hey, if I'm a liberally-biased reporter, I've got to start playing the part, don't I?


Modifications... the blogroll.

*Tim has a new address because his Diary-X crapped out.

*Bullfight is a blog put on by the rival paper that is run by Dan Nguyen-Tan, a former city councilman. Nguyen-Tan doesn't generally share my political leanings, but does share my odd and twisted sense of humor.

*Allen is another one of the Tule boys. He just graduated from UCSB and is now immersed in the wonderful world of being a film extra.


You know you're from Happy Camp when.

About 50 percent custom!!!!

You know you're from Happy Camp when...

Your idea of a traffic jam is ten cars waiting to pass a logging truck on the highway.

"Vacation" means going to Redding for the weekend.

You measure distance in hours.

You know several people who have hit a deer more than once.

You know what the "Snake Pit" is.

You consider forest fires spectator events, complete with lawn chairs and beer.

Your grandparents drive at 65 mph on Highway 96 in torrential rain without flinching.

You see people wearing hunting clothes at social events.

You install security lights on your house and garage and then leave both unlocked.

You think of the major food groups as deer meat, beer, fish and berries.

You carry jumper cables in your car and your wife knows how to use them.

There are 7 empty cars running in the parking lot at the grocery store at any given time.

You design your kid's Halloween costume to fit under a rain poncho.

You know where all the pot that Humboldt County takes credit for is really grown.

You've ever included the words "Bigfoot Trailer Park" in a joke.

You can drive to Yreka without having to throw up.

The seasons of the year are as follows: rainy season, too damn hot season, and deer season.

You know what "aama" is.

It takes you 3 hours to go to the store for one item even when you're in a rush, because you have to stop and talk to everyone in town.

You got the nickname "Happy" when you went to college.


And I thought my day sucked.

My roommate's romantic relationship terminated tonight. On Valentine's Day.



You didn't read about this.

Buried news story of the week: The death of Fr. Andrea Santoro.


Some of my favorite headlines from newspapers and blog concerning the Dick Cheney shooting:

Sydney Morning Herald: "Cheney hunts quail and everyone else ducks"

Houston Chronicale: "Hit me with you best (buck) shot"

Deadspin: "Don't shoot, I'm just an attorney"

The Moderate Voice: "Report: Cheney shooting based on 'faulty intelligence'"

Palm Beach Post: "Dick Cheney's 'bird flew' problem" Subhead: "From
Dan Quayle to 'Damn Quail!'"

Melbourne Herald-Sun: "Cheney's no dead-eye Dick"

Winnipeg Sun: "Cheney's got a gun"

Washington Post: "Shoots, Hides and Leaves"

Lead of a Scripps wire story: The first shooting involving a vice president
since the time of Aaron Burr has lit up the blogosphere with political
jokesters lampooning Vice President Dick Cheney's weekend hunting
accident as "Quailgate."


Spring Cleaning

Did a little sprucing up on the right-hand side.

*I added some new blogs and bands.

*Everything but the news section has been placed in alphabetical order.

*I added the "Causes" section.


Good luck...

Have a conversation with a virtual hard left-winger below!!!!


Don't be afraid of the tone of my voice...

This is a newer classic from about four or five years ago. If you have yet to see this, your life is not complete.

Vote Walken in 2008.


What has your job done for you today?

Out of my own personal curiosity, I decided to consider what being in journalism has caused to happen in my life so far.

Really interesting stuff:

+ I rappelled off a four-story fire tower. I'm scared of heights.

+ I played a role in getting a reporter for the Los Angeles Times fired for alleged sloppy reporting and ethical lapses.

+ I've gone a 20-mile chase with a photographer looking for a felony traffic stop. In a blue van. We found it, too.

+ I've placed in the top 20 in the Hearst National Journalism Awards program. Twice.

+ I went to a national convention in Las Vegas with all expenses paid (except for what I lost at blackjack), and in the process ate at an awards luncheon that included sturgeon caviar.

+ I drove a fire truck on a road course. Kicked ass too, in my humble opinion.

Just-missed really interesting stuff:

+I had full firefighter gear on and was moments away from walking into a burning building when CDF got a call to respond to an actual fire. Shoot.

Other details of note:

+ I spent 10 weeks pursuing a story on horseback police. Jokes flew around the newsroom about my "trot-along" and that I had purchased chaps for the story. Not true, by the way.

+ I manage to tick off a county supervisor and chief administrative office in the same day by screwing up on long division.

+ My first reaction to being told by an editor that a story I wrote might have helped prevent a strike was to get pissed.

+ I've covered sporting events in football, basketball, baseball, softball, track and field, rugby, lacrosse and fencing.

+ My first newspaper story was published after the promise of extra credit from my yearbook teacher Mrs. Jefferson if it wound up being printed. Oddly enough, I was getting an A in yearbook anyway.